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Intimacy

The more intimate the relationship the greater the joy and exhilaration.

BUT

The greater the risk of being hurt if things go wrong.

Fear of “being hurt again if I let myself fall in love again” is one of the most common relationship destroyers. It’s effect is usually a sudden withdrawal from the relationship. It’s the relationship equivalent of “You can’t fire me... I just resigned!”

This fear is very different from the fear of being smothered when someone gets too close  and dynamiting the bridge which I talk about in The Magic Restaurant  and The Chemistry Myth .

Fear of being hurt by love is much harder to resolve.

More to come here .,..

The answer

Building a safe process between the  partners which recognises the risks of getting very close but where this is no longer a reason for avoiding this wonderful experience again and again and again.

You can read more about the problems when two  people have different appetites for intimacy and what happens when they dine at The Magic Restaurant